Throughout life there will be periods of disillusionment for an individual. There will be people that disappoint you. There will be situations that turn your stomach. There will decisions made by others that sadden you. There will be remarks that hurt you in the worse ways. There will be circumstances that you wonder if you will ever be able to manage and come out still standing.
The key is to remember that God is GOD! God is GOD in the big things. God is GOD in the little things. GOD is GOD!
I PRAISE my GOD in all things today. I PRAISE Him for those little things that are bothering me personally. I PRAISE Him for our crazy, psycho world that seems to be getting more and more evil. I PRAISE Him for all the hurts that are going through my head and heart this day. I PRAISE Him because HE is my GOD and in control of ALL things. I PRAISE Him because GOD will ALWAYS be GOD and there is not a soul on earth that can change that fact. Thank you my Lord and my GOD for being my LORD and my GOD.
Friday, June 29, 2007
Tuesday, June 19, 2007
Life is Great!
I know a week ago I was sad because it seemed as if my babies were getting way too independent.
This evening I had to go to the store to pick up some breakfast snacks for our Advisory Board. As we were walking my middle daughter noticed my son's toes. It disgusted her.
Em is a special girl. When I first brought her baby brother home from the hospital she really checked every part of him out. She wanted to take care of him. Her way of doing that has stuck with me for 9 years now.
I used to catch her (at the age of 2 1/2) take his bootie socks off and pick the toe jam from between his tiny toes. That was pretty gross in my book, but she wanted him to be clean and comfortable. Emily hated having anything in between her toes so she assumed her brother did as well.
If you were in that store with us it would have been apparent that her brother could care less what is on his feet or between his toes.
We came home and as I was loading the dishwasher I heard a slap followed by a "sit still".
Emily had her brother laying on the couch looking through a book as she cut his toe nails and cleaned them out for him. (By the way, he didn't seem to mind the slap!)
As I watched that scene, I felt so incredibly blessed. I was blessed because my babies were caring for each other. I was blessed because I got a glimpse of my 2 1/2 year old daughter once again. I was blessed because I got a glimpse of my little boy laying there so contently as he was cared for by his big sis. I was blessed because I saw how God created my daughter with compassion and a need to help others from the time she was born and it is working out to this day in her life.
Thank you Lord for allowing me to see the past in my changing children. I am blessed!
This evening I had to go to the store to pick up some breakfast snacks for our Advisory Board. As we were walking my middle daughter noticed my son's toes. It disgusted her.
Em is a special girl. When I first brought her baby brother home from the hospital she really checked every part of him out. She wanted to take care of him. Her way of doing that has stuck with me for 9 years now.
I used to catch her (at the age of 2 1/2) take his bootie socks off and pick the toe jam from between his tiny toes. That was pretty gross in my book, but she wanted him to be clean and comfortable. Emily hated having anything in between her toes so she assumed her brother did as well.
If you were in that store with us it would have been apparent that her brother could care less what is on his feet or between his toes.
We came home and as I was loading the dishwasher I heard a slap followed by a "sit still".
Emily had her brother laying on the couch looking through a book as she cut his toe nails and cleaned them out for him. (By the way, he didn't seem to mind the slap!)
As I watched that scene, I felt so incredibly blessed. I was blessed because my babies were caring for each other. I was blessed because I got a glimpse of my 2 1/2 year old daughter once again. I was blessed because I got a glimpse of my little boy laying there so contently as he was cared for by his big sis. I was blessed because I saw how God created my daughter with compassion and a need to help others from the time she was born and it is working out to this day in her life.
Thank you Lord for allowing me to see the past in my changing children. I am blessed!
Friday, June 15, 2007
DEPRESSION
This has been a traumatic week for me!
I dropped my baby off at the park yesterday morning at 9:00am so that she could participate in her FIRST high school cross country practice. She is officially in high school :(
After practice I drove her down to Camp Neosa AND left her :( She is working there and will be gone all summer... NOT GOOD!
My husband didn't come home last night. He stayed at the corps all night working on a playground for the neighborhood kids. He and two other staff members worked ALL night... I was lonely :(
The CAVS lost :( Enough said! I didn't even watch the game. I watched a movie instead.
I wasn't able to go to the Officers' Farewell today ... United Way Day of Care day! I'm sad that I won't be able to say good bye to some dear officer friends and especially to their dear children:(
Emily has her FIRST babysitting gig tonight. She is growing up TOO FAST :( She shouldn't be old enough to babysit... she is a baby herself... my baby girl :(
I am home alone until about 9:00pm. It is a Friday night and my whole family is out doing their own thing... living their own lives. It is depressing for me :( When did they all get so independent?
I am going to go and have some time with my Jesus.... He will cheer me up :)
I dropped my baby off at the park yesterday morning at 9:00am so that she could participate in her FIRST high school cross country practice. She is officially in high school :(
After practice I drove her down to Camp Neosa AND left her :( She is working there and will be gone all summer... NOT GOOD!
My husband didn't come home last night. He stayed at the corps all night working on a playground for the neighborhood kids. He and two other staff members worked ALL night... I was lonely :(
The CAVS lost :( Enough said! I didn't even watch the game. I watched a movie instead.
I wasn't able to go to the Officers' Farewell today ... United Way Day of Care day! I'm sad that I won't be able to say good bye to some dear officer friends and especially to their dear children:(
Emily has her FIRST babysitting gig tonight. She is growing up TOO FAST :( She shouldn't be old enough to babysit... she is a baby herself... my baby girl :(
I am home alone until about 9:00pm. It is a Friday night and my whole family is out doing their own thing... living their own lives. It is depressing for me :( When did they all get so independent?
I am going to go and have some time with my Jesus.... He will cheer me up :)
Sunday, June 03, 2007
NBA Finals
Rasheed Wallace: "Hey Guys... should one of us stop him?"Rip Hamilton: "I'll just wait here until he comes back down."
Chauncy: "It's only one shot... how many can one guy get anyway? I'm Mr. Big Shot...NOT LeBron."
Chris Webber: "Time out! Time out.....wait we don't have any time-outs left!"
Z: "I got your back buddy."
What more needs to be said? The CAVS are going to the finals!
Thanks Detroit for losing your "poise!"
Thursday, May 31, 2007
Lesson Learned
When we were Divisional Youth Leaders it always bothered us to see some really great kids in the division not participate in camp or in divisional activities. We know the impact these things can have on a young person. They feel more connected to the Army and see the bigger picture. Not to mention that their influence and abilities would be a tremendous asset to the programs and to the individuals around them.
My oldest daughter is going to High School next year (YIKES). She is in the band programs and a Cross Country runner. Band sessions and athletic training takes place all summer long. They actually start the week after school lets out. She is excellent in both of these programs and needs to participate in the summer activities. The bandmasters and the coach need her to participate during the summer. Of course come fall she will have football games every Friday night and I just found out yesterday that she will have Cross Country meets every Saturday. That eliminates her from a lot in regards to the Army. She is supposed to work at camp this summer and she is supposed to be in NEOSA Brass this fall. There is no way she will be able to do it all.
I never realized how much school impacts those "off times" in a young person's life. I think if I were a DYS now I would find a way to reach out to those kids more. There has to be a way!!
My oldest daughter is going to High School next year (YIKES). She is in the band programs and a Cross Country runner. Band sessions and athletic training takes place all summer long. They actually start the week after school lets out. She is excellent in both of these programs and needs to participate in the summer activities. The bandmasters and the coach need her to participate during the summer. Of course come fall she will have football games every Friday night and I just found out yesterday that she will have Cross Country meets every Saturday. That eliminates her from a lot in regards to the Army. She is supposed to work at camp this summer and she is supposed to be in NEOSA Brass this fall. There is no way she will be able to do it all.
I never realized how much school impacts those "off times" in a young person's life. I think if I were a DYS now I would find a way to reach out to those kids more. There has to be a way!!
Friday, May 11, 2007
I have been studying the book of Galatians over the last several weeks. It has been a challenge for me as I have reflected on my walk in relation to God's Word in this particular book.
I thought I would post on some of those things that jumped out at me as of late.
Galatians 5:16-21
Life by the Spirit
16So I say, live by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the sinful nature. 17For the sinful nature desires what is contrary to the Spirit and the Spirit what is contrary to the sinful nature. They are in conflict with each other, so that you do not do what you want. 18But if you are led by the Spirit, you are not under law.
19The acts of the sinful nature are obvious: sexual immorality, impurity and debauchery; 20idolatry and witchcraft; hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions 21and envy; drunkenness, orgies, and the like. I warn you, as I did before, that those who live like this will not inherit the kingdom of God.
As I read this list, I thought to myself, “Wow these are bad things”. Take a closer look at these though. I think sometimes when we think of sin, we think of murder, adultery, stealing, lying and a host of others mentioned in the 10 commandments. When I first read this particular list I kind of scanned over them. However, look at these a little closer.
As I read this I realized that this is so often me. I obviously don't mean to sin, but I do. I do get selfish. I do go into fits of rage. I do sin. I don't believe I am the only one who falls into this trap though. I have seen Christians in fits of rage. I have had friends who were sexually immoral… Christian friends! I have seen believers vying to get ahead because of their selfish ambition. Look at all the televangelists that have gone down in the last few years. Commissioner Todd Bassett, who has served in the Salvation Army as the National Commander was just recently named to head the National Association of Evangelicals after the Reverend Ted Haggert had to answer to allegations that he had a 3 year relationship with a gay hooker. He was the head of the National Association of Evangelicals!!!!
What about dissention? Have you seen dissention in the church? Be honest! Envy? Jealousy? Even as Christians, sometimes we allow these sins to creep into our lives. It is so easy to fall back into the sinful nature which we once walked away from.
When we begin living by our own power we fail. It is only through the power of the Holy Spirit that we are able to live as God created us to live.
God has really blasted me with this truth recently. It is a passage of scripture that I have read a zillion times, so many times that it simply became words to me. I thank God that He made me read and see these words once more in a new light.
The key for me was the last part of the passage where it says, "I warn you, as I did before, that those who live like this will not inherit the kingdom of God." Is that blunt or what?
I thought I would post on some of those things that jumped out at me as of late.
Galatians 5:16-21
Life by the Spirit
16So I say, live by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the sinful nature. 17For the sinful nature desires what is contrary to the Spirit and the Spirit what is contrary to the sinful nature. They are in conflict with each other, so that you do not do what you want. 18But if you are led by the Spirit, you are not under law.
19The acts of the sinful nature are obvious: sexual immorality, impurity and debauchery; 20idolatry and witchcraft; hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions 21and envy; drunkenness, orgies, and the like. I warn you, as I did before, that those who live like this will not inherit the kingdom of God.
As I read this list, I thought to myself, “Wow these are bad things”. Take a closer look at these though. I think sometimes when we think of sin, we think of murder, adultery, stealing, lying and a host of others mentioned in the 10 commandments. When I first read this particular list I kind of scanned over them. However, look at these a little closer.
As I read this I realized that this is so often me. I obviously don't mean to sin, but I do. I do get selfish. I do go into fits of rage. I do sin. I don't believe I am the only one who falls into this trap though. I have seen Christians in fits of rage. I have had friends who were sexually immoral… Christian friends! I have seen believers vying to get ahead because of their selfish ambition. Look at all the televangelists that have gone down in the last few years. Commissioner Todd Bassett, who has served in the Salvation Army as the National Commander was just recently named to head the National Association of Evangelicals after the Reverend Ted Haggert had to answer to allegations that he had a 3 year relationship with a gay hooker. He was the head of the National Association of Evangelicals!!!!
What about dissention? Have you seen dissention in the church? Be honest! Envy? Jealousy? Even as Christians, sometimes we allow these sins to creep into our lives. It is so easy to fall back into the sinful nature which we once walked away from.
When we begin living by our own power we fail. It is only through the power of the Holy Spirit that we are able to live as God created us to live.
God has really blasted me with this truth recently. It is a passage of scripture that I have read a zillion times, so many times that it simply became words to me. I thank God that He made me read and see these words once more in a new light.
The key for me was the last part of the passage where it says, "I warn you, as I did before, that those who live like this will not inherit the kingdom of God." Is that blunt or what?
Wednesday, May 09, 2007
WHAT???
So what happens when the reality of the day hits you smack in the face?
There was a "threat" at my daughter's school yesterday. It happened at the end of the day. A threatening note was found in a bathroom.
Parents didn't find out about it until today when note was sent home explaining what had happened. We have been assured that the school was thoroughly inspected and every inch of the place checked.
I can't write much about this because I am a bit stunned.
At what point did we allow this to happen to our society? At what point did we just sit back and allow kids to do whatever they pleased? When did we get to the point of just hoping nothing crazy would happen to our kids in school during the day? What the heck happened???
There was a "threat" at my daughter's school yesterday. It happened at the end of the day. A threatening note was found in a bathroom.
Parents didn't find out about it until today when note was sent home explaining what had happened. We have been assured that the school was thoroughly inspected and every inch of the place checked.
I can't write much about this because I am a bit stunned.
At what point did we allow this to happen to our society? At what point did we just sit back and allow kids to do whatever they pleased? When did we get to the point of just hoping nothing crazy would happen to our kids in school during the day? What the heck happened???
Tuesday, May 08, 2007
Agenda for the Day
My Agenda for Today
Print programs for Home League Annual Dinner (for Thursday)
Pick up centerpieces for the Dinner
Print music for Auxiliary Meeting (tomorrow)
Print Agenda & Minutes for Auxiliary Meeting (tomorrow)
Organize room for Auxiliary Meeting
Prep with husband on Program Committee Meeting
Complete Inventory of Building and Quarters (all stuff in my office)
Take Em to softball practice (while Daddy's at band)
Go to Katie's band concert (while Daddy's at band)
God's Agenda for Today
Stay home with a son who found CHICKEN POX all over his body this morning!!
God is a wonderful God and I thank Him even for the CHICKEN POX! Does anyone know how long he will have these things anyway? It has been 13 years since my last child had them and my memory is not that good. He did have the vaccine as a baby. FYI for those who were vaccinated... apparently there is a booster that you will need about 7 years after the first vaccine. I obviously didn't know about it.
Friday, May 04, 2007
Program Evaluation
I spent yesterday afternoon listing all of the things we "do" at our corps. Actually, I listed all of the programs. We have a few Advisory Board members helping us to evaluate things and thought it would be a good time to really get a handle on things seeing that I've been here almost a year now.
I feel like I've never been busier in my life. With the appointment and the kids I just go, go, go! After completing this task of program evaluation I had a better understanding as to why I feel so busy. We DO alot!!! I had 58 different programs to evaluate. That would sound crazy to most, but in all honesty there were 58! My husband and I each lead a few things, but we have leaders for most programs. That may sound great too, but we still have to be involved in those 58 programs in some way because we are the officers (in some cases that involvement only includes our mental powers every once in a while to make sure things are going in the right direction).
Please understand that I am not complaining. It was actually helpful for me to see this evaluation because I realized that we are doing okay. The programs are incredibly balanced as well between evangelistic programs and discipling programs. There always seems to be someone in the corps that wants more though... one more service... one more program. I have a tendency to allow people to guilt me into doing things. I think I will carry this program list with me so that when the guilt brigade comes after me I can pull it out and see that we are doing our best and our best is pretty efficient at this point in time.
If you would like to pray for me and my husband please feel free. We have a vibrant corps with wonderful people. Most of the people are new to the Army in the last year. Our corps was ALWAYS a very traditional corps. My husband and I are young, but more traditional than most officers our age. I think the older folks in the congregation were counting on that traditional side of us to come and change their corps back to what it was years ago. I have found in recent months though that tradition changes. When you have a corps of mostly new salvationists, new traditions arise. Our corps used to be a very large corps and due to a variety of circumstances it dwindled down to almost nothing over the last several years. It is on the rebound now. We are experiencing a time when we are trying to figure out what the Army is going to look like in Akron, OH. It will never be the Akron Citadel of 40 years ago, 10 years ago, or even 1 year ago. That is a hard pill to swallow for some. Maybe that has been a hard pill for me to swallow. Please pray that God helps us all to accept HIS direction for our community and corps. I LOVE this appointment and the people in our corps and our community. I always pray that I follow God's guidance in what we "do" so that He will be lifted up and glorified.
Thanks for reading my ramblings. This is going to be an awesome day... I can just feel it!!!
I feel like I've never been busier in my life. With the appointment and the kids I just go, go, go! After completing this task of program evaluation I had a better understanding as to why I feel so busy. We DO alot!!! I had 58 different programs to evaluate. That would sound crazy to most, but in all honesty there were 58! My husband and I each lead a few things, but we have leaders for most programs. That may sound great too, but we still have to be involved in those 58 programs in some way because we are the officers (in some cases that involvement only includes our mental powers every once in a while to make sure things are going in the right direction).
Please understand that I am not complaining. It was actually helpful for me to see this evaluation because I realized that we are doing okay. The programs are incredibly balanced as well between evangelistic programs and discipling programs. There always seems to be someone in the corps that wants more though... one more service... one more program. I have a tendency to allow people to guilt me into doing things. I think I will carry this program list with me so that when the guilt brigade comes after me I can pull it out and see that we are doing our best and our best is pretty efficient at this point in time.
If you would like to pray for me and my husband please feel free. We have a vibrant corps with wonderful people. Most of the people are new to the Army in the last year. Our corps was ALWAYS a very traditional corps. My husband and I are young, but more traditional than most officers our age. I think the older folks in the congregation were counting on that traditional side of us to come and change their corps back to what it was years ago. I have found in recent months though that tradition changes. When you have a corps of mostly new salvationists, new traditions arise. Our corps used to be a very large corps and due to a variety of circumstances it dwindled down to almost nothing over the last several years. It is on the rebound now. We are experiencing a time when we are trying to figure out what the Army is going to look like in Akron, OH. It will never be the Akron Citadel of 40 years ago, 10 years ago, or even 1 year ago. That is a hard pill to swallow for some. Maybe that has been a hard pill for me to swallow. Please pray that God helps us all to accept HIS direction for our community and corps. I LOVE this appointment and the people in our corps and our community. I always pray that I follow God's guidance in what we "do" so that He will be lifted up and glorified.
Thanks for reading my ramblings. This is going to be an awesome day... I can just feel it!!!
Friday, April 13, 2007
At Home and NOT feeling GUILTY!
I am home today. I made the decision NOT to go into the office until I absolutely have to this evening. I have to be there by about 5:15 pm and spend the evening there, so I am taking today for me - well actually for my house!
I am tired! That is an understatement. I have not had time at all to reflect or to contemplate anything. Everything I do seems rushed and thrown together. As I look in my office there are piles of work to accomplish... and that is with being in that office six days a week. There is always more administration, speaking engagements, employee problems, corps problems, etc. Quite a change from a year ago at this time. I homeschooled my kids and then spent every evening working. I only went into the office two to three afternoons a week. Don't think I was a slacker though... I am quite happy with the strides I made in that appointment and with what was accomplished through that ministry God gave me there. And though I am not a "women's libber" necessarily, I believe I changed that particular appointment and was not just considered one of those "DHQ wives" that was along for the ride. That probably sounds bad.. sorry!
Back from my rabblings...As I look at my home there are piles there too. It is a mess mainly because when I come home in the evening I typically rush the kids to the various places they are to be at and then we do homework after we get back. There is no time for cleaning. There is no time for talking. There is no time for reading and studying. There is no time for Christian education with my kids except for a few tidbits here and there.
This is NOT how I want to live.
I am enjoying my current appointment. It is a difficult one though. We actually have two appointments - Corps Officers and Area Coordinators. They are very distinct appointments with various people having very distinct expectations of us. It can be very time consuming and exhausting as we try to do both well.
I have decided today that I have neglected my home, my health, my relationship with Christ, my family and my friends over the last 8 months. It must stop today! So I am at home... getting my physical home in order. I am at home... cleaning off my "place" that I meet with God (or am supposed to meet with God). I am at home...preparing a meal for my family for this evening. I am at home... paying MY bills not a hundred other people's bills. I am at home... just being Sue, not Captain Betts!
Please don't look at this post as me being pessimistic. I am actually quite optimistic today. I am optimistic because I think I have finally gotten it through my think head that I cannot change the world for Christ, when mine is falling apart around me.
I am tired! That is an understatement. I have not had time at all to reflect or to contemplate anything. Everything I do seems rushed and thrown together. As I look in my office there are piles of work to accomplish... and that is with being in that office six days a week. There is always more administration, speaking engagements, employee problems, corps problems, etc. Quite a change from a year ago at this time. I homeschooled my kids and then spent every evening working. I only went into the office two to three afternoons a week. Don't think I was a slacker though... I am quite happy with the strides I made in that appointment and with what was accomplished through that ministry God gave me there. And though I am not a "women's libber" necessarily, I believe I changed that particular appointment and was not just considered one of those "DHQ wives" that was along for the ride. That probably sounds bad.. sorry!
Back from my rabblings...As I look at my home there are piles there too. It is a mess mainly because when I come home in the evening I typically rush the kids to the various places they are to be at and then we do homework after we get back. There is no time for cleaning. There is no time for talking. There is no time for reading and studying. There is no time for Christian education with my kids except for a few tidbits here and there.
This is NOT how I want to live.
I am enjoying my current appointment. It is a difficult one though. We actually have two appointments - Corps Officers and Area Coordinators. They are very distinct appointments with various people having very distinct expectations of us. It can be very time consuming and exhausting as we try to do both well.
I have decided today that I have neglected my home, my health, my relationship with Christ, my family and my friends over the last 8 months. It must stop today! So I am at home... getting my physical home in order. I am at home... cleaning off my "place" that I meet with God (or am supposed to meet with God). I am at home...preparing a meal for my family for this evening. I am at home... paying MY bills not a hundred other people's bills. I am at home... just being Sue, not Captain Betts!
Please don't look at this post as me being pessimistic. I am actually quite optimistic today. I am optimistic because I think I have finally gotten it through my think head that I cannot change the world for Christ, when mine is falling apart around me.
Tuesday, March 27, 2007
Date Night
The kids are on spring break this week. Believe it or not, they have never had a spring break!
Jim and I have decided to take as much of the week as possible to spend with the kids. We have at least one meeting each day, but for the most part will be able to get away and spend some time with them.
Last night at about 9:00pm Jim and I decided to go out on a date. We went to Kent, OH (which is only about 5 minutes from us) for a movie. It was quite an experience. The movie was good. We saw "Reign over Me". It is about a guy who basically got "lost" after his family died in one of the planes during 9/11. His friend was a bit "lost" in his life too, even though his life seemed normal.
No one was in the theater until about 30 seconds before the movie started. As we sat there it occurred to us that we were the oldest people in the theater... by about 20 years! Kent, Ohio is college town (Kent State University). The college kids are on spring break so the place ended up being pretty full. It was an odd feeling being there. They laughed in places that seemed odd to us and then we laughed in other places, by ourselves of course.
We both whispered to each other, asking how these kids would understand and truly "get" the movie. Most were probably around 12 when 9/11 happened. Most probably didn't have spouses. Most probably didn't have kids or a family of their own. Though it was a good movie and younger people might enjoy it, until you have certain life experiences I don't think you can truly "get" the entire movie.
Jim and I then embarked on a discussion of the importance of life experience. Education, wisdom and intellegience are great, but experience does count. I think about the Army in general and discussions that happen regarding the leadership of the Army. Many push for younger more culturally relevant individuals to be put into higher leadership roles. Youth can bring a lot to the table, but so does experience. There is a difference between seeing something happen from a distance and actually experiencing it.
I think I would still be considered a young officer. I hope though that I never get to the point where I stop seeking the opinions of those who have come before me, those who have already experienced some of the things I am yet to experience.
As we left the theater EVERYONE seemed to be looking at us. It was freaky. There are not too many situations where I feel like the oddball, but that definitely was one of them.
Jim and I have decided to take as much of the week as possible to spend with the kids. We have at least one meeting each day, but for the most part will be able to get away and spend some time with them.
Last night at about 9:00pm Jim and I decided to go out on a date. We went to Kent, OH (which is only about 5 minutes from us) for a movie. It was quite an experience. The movie was good. We saw "Reign over Me". It is about a guy who basically got "lost" after his family died in one of the planes during 9/11. His friend was a bit "lost" in his life too, even though his life seemed normal.
No one was in the theater until about 30 seconds before the movie started. As we sat there it occurred to us that we were the oldest people in the theater... by about 20 years! Kent, Ohio is college town (Kent State University). The college kids are on spring break so the place ended up being pretty full. It was an odd feeling being there. They laughed in places that seemed odd to us and then we laughed in other places, by ourselves of course.
We both whispered to each other, asking how these kids would understand and truly "get" the movie. Most were probably around 12 when 9/11 happened. Most probably didn't have spouses. Most probably didn't have kids or a family of their own. Though it was a good movie and younger people might enjoy it, until you have certain life experiences I don't think you can truly "get" the entire movie.
Jim and I then embarked on a discussion of the importance of life experience. Education, wisdom and intellegience are great, but experience does count. I think about the Army in general and discussions that happen regarding the leadership of the Army. Many push for younger more culturally relevant individuals to be put into higher leadership roles. Youth can bring a lot to the table, but so does experience. There is a difference between seeing something happen from a distance and actually experiencing it.
I think I would still be considered a young officer. I hope though that I never get to the point where I stop seeking the opinions of those who have come before me, those who have already experienced some of the things I am yet to experience.
As we left the theater EVERYONE seemed to be looking at us. It was freaky. There are not too many situations where I feel like the oddball, but that definitely was one of them.
Date Night
The kids are on spring break this week. Believe it or not, they have never had a spring break!
Jim and I have decided to take as much of the week as possible to spend with the kids. We have at least one meeting each day, but for the most part will be able to get away and spend some time with them.
Last night at about 9:00pm Jim and I decided to go out on a date. We went to Kent, OH (which is only about 5 minutes from us) for a movie. It was quite an experience. The movie was good. We saw "Reign over Me". It is about a guy who basically got "lost" after his family died in one of the planes during 9/11. His friend was a bit "lost" in his life too, even though his life seemed normal.
No one was in the theater until about 30 seconds before the movie started. As we sat there it occurred to us that we were the oldest people in the theater... by about 20 years! Kent, Ohio is college town (Kent State University). The college kids are on spring break so the place ended up being pretty full. It was an odd feeling being there. They laughed in places that seemed odd to us and then we laughed in other places, by ourselves of course.
We both whispered to each other, asking how these kids would understand and truly "get" the movie. Most were probably around 12 when 9/11 happened. Most probably didn't have spouses. Most probably didn't have kids or a family of their own. Though it was a good movie and younger people might enjoy it, until you have certain life experiences I don't think you can truly "get" the entire movie.
Jim and I then embarked on a discussion of the importance of life experience. Education, wisdom and intellegience are great, but experience does count. I think about the Army in general and discussions that happen regarding the leadership of the Army. Many push for younger more culturally relevant individuals to be put into higher leadership roles. Youth can bring a lot to the table, but so does experience. There is a difference between seeing something happen from a distance and actually experiencing it.
As we left the theater EVERYONE seemed to be looking at us. It was freaky. There are not too many situations where I feel like the oddball, but that definitely was one of them.
Jim and I have decided to take as much of the week as possible to spend with the kids. We have at least one meeting each day, but for the most part will be able to get away and spend some time with them.
Last night at about 9:00pm Jim and I decided to go out on a date. We went to Kent, OH (which is only about 5 minutes from us) for a movie. It was quite an experience. The movie was good. We saw "Reign over Me". It is about a guy who basically got "lost" after his family died in one of the planes during 9/11. His friend was a bit "lost" in his life too, even though his life seemed normal.
No one was in the theater until about 30 seconds before the movie started. As we sat there it occurred to us that we were the oldest people in the theater... by about 20 years! Kent, Ohio is college town (Kent State University). The college kids are on spring break so the place ended up being pretty full. It was an odd feeling being there. They laughed in places that seemed odd to us and then we laughed in other places, by ourselves of course.
We both whispered to each other, asking how these kids would understand and truly "get" the movie. Most were probably around 12 when 9/11 happened. Most probably didn't have spouses. Most probably didn't have kids or a family of their own. Though it was a good movie and younger people might enjoy it, until you have certain life experiences I don't think you can truly "get" the entire movie.
Jim and I then embarked on a discussion of the importance of life experience. Education, wisdom and intellegience are great, but experience does count. I think about the Army in general and discussions that happen regarding the leadership of the Army. Many push for younger more culturally relevant individuals to be put into higher leadership roles. Youth can bring a lot to the table, but so does experience. There is a difference between seeing something happen from a distance and actually experiencing it.
As we left the theater EVERYONE seemed to be looking at us. It was freaky. There are not too many situations where I feel like the oddball, but that definitely was one of them.
Friday, March 23, 2007
Shirley
I had to go to a funeral this week. Well, I didn't HAVE to go, I wanted to go. It was the funeral of a dear friend... a saint in my mind. Shirley was a soldier from our first corps appointment. She was a wonderful soldier and a true mentor.
Shirley was about 70 years old when we were in Mt. Vernon. She didn't seem that old (not that 70 is old of course). Shirley was THE lady you could count on handling things when we had to be away or when we simply didn't get something. She actually ran the Christmas toy shop/distribution effort for us. I distinctly remember Shirley telling me every year that at some point I was going to have to learn how to do her job. She tried to tell me each year that she was old and would be retiring soon. I would simply smile and let her know that I was never going to let her retire. She also assured me that we would not be in Mt. Vernon forever and that someday I would have to do the toy shop in another location. I would just tell her that she would have to move with us. It always seemed to work!
I did watch Shirley though and I did learn how to do Christmas from her. I would have to say she taught me quite well by her example :)
As I sat in her funeral service on Thursday I came to realize that I truly never believed that Shirley would retire. I never believed that she would ever die either. Shirley was a rock. She was a rock that I counted on more than I ever realized.
I was a kid in that first appointment. God knew that Shirley was EXACTLY what Jim and I needed. Without her who knows what would have happened.
I pray that the Lord helps me to daily realize the saints that he places in my path. I need them. I also pray that God uses me in the life of another. Will I be that rock, that example of Christ, to another? I can only hope.
Shirley was about 70 years old when we were in Mt. Vernon. She didn't seem that old (not that 70 is old of course). Shirley was THE lady you could count on handling things when we had to be away or when we simply didn't get something. She actually ran the Christmas toy shop/distribution effort for us. I distinctly remember Shirley telling me every year that at some point I was going to have to learn how to do her job. She tried to tell me each year that she was old and would be retiring soon. I would simply smile and let her know that I was never going to let her retire. She also assured me that we would not be in Mt. Vernon forever and that someday I would have to do the toy shop in another location. I would just tell her that she would have to move with us. It always seemed to work!
I did watch Shirley though and I did learn how to do Christmas from her. I would have to say she taught me quite well by her example :)
As I sat in her funeral service on Thursday I came to realize that I truly never believed that Shirley would retire. I never believed that she would ever die either. Shirley was a rock. She was a rock that I counted on more than I ever realized.
I was a kid in that first appointment. God knew that Shirley was EXACTLY what Jim and I needed. Without her who knows what would have happened.
I pray that the Lord helps me to daily realize the saints that he places in my path. I need them. I also pray that God uses me in the life of another. Will I be that rock, that example of Christ, to another? I can only hope.
Tuesday, January 23, 2007
AMAZING GRACE
God is truly amazing. So much has happened in our corps in recent months. In September we began having a Salvation Meeting again. It has been a long time since we have had to have a Sunday evening meeting. Our territorial leadership set a mandate to begin these services a while back. We decided to begin them in September of 2006.
We have three corps in our county and an ARC. All of us join together every Sunday evening to celebrate Jesus and to preach the gospel. This meeting is focused around salvation. We expect that those who are unsaved will be in the meeting. Believe it or not, every week we have someone who does not know the Lord come to the meeting.
Last week we had 79 in the meeting. The altar was packed with those who felt the Lord tugging on their hearts and lives were won for HIM.
We also have a county Bible Bowl team and practices are held on Sunday afternoons at 4:30 pm, prior to the Salvation Meeting. That has been such an experience for the kids. The corps are three VERY different corps, with VERY different types of kids. By God's grace they have bonded and it has been a tremendous blessing to see the Summit County kids hanging out together at divisional events. I bring the kids up because on Sunday evening as I looked around our chapel I realized how God was working in them - the kids.
Every week these kids see the grace of God at work. They hear the testimonies of the guys who are new to the ARC program and have been saved. They hear the guys praising God for one more day of sobriety. They watched as a gentleman who has lived as a woman for the last 20 years was saved, and literally overnight went back to living and looking like a man (and they rejoiced with him in this change). They see the homeless guy who was picked up out of the park the night before sitting in our service. AMAZING GRACE is played out for them each and every week. Think of the impact God is making on their young lives!!
On Sunday night I sat behind three eight year old boys: an african american, a caucasion, and a puerto-rican. They giggled and talked through the whole service (quietly of course). Let's talk about racial reconciliation! God is AMAZING!
We have three corps in our county and an ARC. All of us join together every Sunday evening to celebrate Jesus and to preach the gospel. This meeting is focused around salvation. We expect that those who are unsaved will be in the meeting. Believe it or not, every week we have someone who does not know the Lord come to the meeting.
Last week we had 79 in the meeting. The altar was packed with those who felt the Lord tugging on their hearts and lives were won for HIM.
We also have a county Bible Bowl team and practices are held on Sunday afternoons at 4:30 pm, prior to the Salvation Meeting. That has been such an experience for the kids. The corps are three VERY different corps, with VERY different types of kids. By God's grace they have bonded and it has been a tremendous blessing to see the Summit County kids hanging out together at divisional events. I bring the kids up because on Sunday evening as I looked around our chapel I realized how God was working in them - the kids.
Every week these kids see the grace of God at work. They hear the testimonies of the guys who are new to the ARC program and have been saved. They hear the guys praising God for one more day of sobriety. They watched as a gentleman who has lived as a woman for the last 20 years was saved, and literally overnight went back to living and looking like a man (and they rejoiced with him in this change). They see the homeless guy who was picked up out of the park the night before sitting in our service. AMAZING GRACE is played out for them each and every week. Think of the impact God is making on their young lives!!
On Sunday night I sat behind three eight year old boys: an african american, a caucasion, and a puerto-rican. They giggled and talked through the whole service (quietly of course). Let's talk about racial reconciliation! God is AMAZING!
Tuesday, January 02, 2007
Time
It is a new year already. The older I get the more I realize that time passes quickly. I have been helping my son with a timeline of his life. Though he is only eight years old, he has quite a bit he'd like to put into this timeline.
I sat down with him and have gone through many old photos. The photos were instant reminders of times past and of a future that is coming very quickly. Before long, my house will be empty of children and probably pets too. In all honesty, it makes me a bit sad.
Why does time seem to go so much quicker when we are adults? As a kid I just wanted to grow up. Now I wish I could go back to my younger years.
I think as we age we realize that there is much that we would like to accomplish in our time on earth with very little time to do so. I sometimes wonder if we go overboard with our own desires for accomplishments rather than spending our moments pondering and asking God what He'd like us to accomplish.
I constantly preach to people that they have a purpose in this life and that God has a plan for them as individuals, a plan that will help HIM to carry out HIS will on earth through them. I am a believer in that philosophy.
The trouble comes when WE try to figure out that plan and more of OUR plans get in the mix than HIS plans.
Maybe the answer, if there is an answer, is to enjoy the time God gives us. Enjoy and marvel in THIS day! Maybe at any age we should be living in the present rather than constantly dwelling on the past or trying to change our future. Maybe if we did that with gratefulness in our hearts, time would not be such an issue with some of us. Something for me to think about on this day!!
Monday, November 20, 2006
A DAY IN THE LIFE...
Today I spent my day at home with a sick child. It was a blessing in disguise. I have been tremendously busy the last few months. In the last 10 days we have conducted a Community Awards Luncheon/Kettle Kick-off (180 people), began a kettle campaign that has to raise $450,000.00, did a corps Thanksgiving Dinner (200 people), and busily bought hundreds of gifts for people in our community. Today I spent the day with my sick daughter wrapping those gifts.
On the docket for this week is finding volunteers to work at our Angel Tree table in the Mall. It has to be manned the entire time the mall is open. Of course I have nobody to do the early shift the day after Thanksgiving, so I will be there at 6:00am and work until 10:00am. I also have to purchase gifts for all of our employees (about 40). Jim and I committed to buying gifts (rather than giftcards) so that we could add a personal touch.... quite a task. I have an advent devotional to write, a chapel to decorate, an employee party to plan, an advisory board party to plan, and of course the morning worship services. Most of this has to be done in the next 10 days, then I get to begin on a new list of "to do's" for weeks 2-4 in December.
In all honesty, I am shot! I love what I am doing though. I have desperately tried to stay in the Word and look to those little interuptions in the season as blessings rather than annoyances. There are a million things that have to be done, and I still have to be there and prepared to deal with broken people. These broken people can be considered interuptions in my life of "to do's", yet the reality is that they are the things that keep me going. I am good at business. I can handle all the things I mentioned before. I can do most of the professional things an officer must do. I cannot handle all the brokenness though... only God can. So I sit back and let God bring me those things that cause me to pause and get stressed out a bit, the interuptions, because I know that I cannot handle these things without Him and His power.
I've been reading Philip Yancey's new book on Prayer. I have only been able to do two to three pages a day as of late, but I'm hanging in there. I came across a prayer that I'd like to share.
On the docket for this week is finding volunteers to work at our Angel Tree table in the Mall. It has to be manned the entire time the mall is open. Of course I have nobody to do the early shift the day after Thanksgiving, so I will be there at 6:00am and work until 10:00am. I also have to purchase gifts for all of our employees (about 40). Jim and I committed to buying gifts (rather than giftcards) so that we could add a personal touch.... quite a task. I have an advent devotional to write, a chapel to decorate, an employee party to plan, an advisory board party to plan, and of course the morning worship services. Most of this has to be done in the next 10 days, then I get to begin on a new list of "to do's" for weeks 2-4 in December.
In all honesty, I am shot! I love what I am doing though. I have desperately tried to stay in the Word and look to those little interuptions in the season as blessings rather than annoyances. There are a million things that have to be done, and I still have to be there and prepared to deal with broken people. These broken people can be considered interuptions in my life of "to do's", yet the reality is that they are the things that keep me going. I am good at business. I can handle all the things I mentioned before. I can do most of the professional things an officer must do. I cannot handle all the brokenness though... only God can. So I sit back and let God bring me those things that cause me to pause and get stressed out a bit, the interuptions, because I know that I cannot handle these things without Him and His power.
I've been reading Philip Yancey's new book on Prayer. I have only been able to do two to three pages a day as of late, but I'm hanging in there. I came across a prayer that I'd like to share.
A Franciscan Benediction
May God bless you with discomfort
At easy answers, half-truths, and superficial relationships
So that you may live deep within your heart.
May God bless you with anger
At injustice, oppression, and exploitation of people,
So that you may work for justice, freedom and peace.
May God bless you with tears
To shed for those who suffer pain, rejection, hunger and war,
So that you may reach out your hand to comfort them and
To turn their pain to joy.
And may God bless you with enough foolishness
To believe that you can make a difference in the world,
So that you can do what others claim cannot be done
To bring justice and kindness to all our children and the poor.
Amen
Thursday, October 19, 2006
Why God Made Little Boys
This Sunday is Adventure Corps Sunday at our corps. I have the wonderful opportunity to deliver God's Word to our congregation.
I have spent the last few days thinking about little boys. Little boys are very different from little girls! I know that is an understatement.
I came across this poem as I have been preparing for my sermon.
Why God Made Little Boys
GOD MADE A WORLD OUT OF HIS DREAMS,
Of magic mountains, oceans and streams,
Prairies and plains and wooded land.
Then paused and thought, "I need someone to stand,
On top of the mountains, to conquer the seas,
Explore the plains and climb the trees.
Someone to start out small and grow,
Sturdy and stong like a tree" and so
He created boys, full of spirit and fun
To explore and conquer, to romp and run.
With dirty faces and banged up chins,
With courageous hearts and boyish grins.
And when He completed the task He'd begun,
He surely said, "That's a job well done."
(author unknown)
I have a new appreciation for my son in recent days. He is growing so fast both physically and intellectually. He is seeing life and figuring out his place in the world. He is doing so well.
In all honesty, I wasn't sure I would be a good mom to a boy. I was very nervous about having a son. You don't really get much choice in the matter though, and praise the Lord for that. I don't know where I'd be without my little boy. He has truly taught me to laugh and to find the joy in life.
I know someday he will be a man. A part of me looks forward to that day when I can see who he becomes. Another part of me has already started to grieve for the little boy who is quickly disappearing. I thank God daily for him and today in particular I entrust my son into the hands of the Lord once again.
Monday, September 11, 2006
Rambling Thoughts & Emotions
The following post is simply my rambling thoughts for the day. A lot of emotions have surfaced today and I just felt like writing them all down. Sorry if I offend anyone. (Quite scary when you have to put a disclaimer at the beginning of a post!!)
Homeschooling vs. Public Education
I 've always received comments from people, officers in particular, about me being a Salvation Army officer that homeschooled my children. There were few people who understood how I managed to do all that I did. I no longer homeschool. Let me tell you, I have less time for the Army now that I am a "normal" officer than when I homeschooled. My hours are shorter and I get called away from meetings more now that the kids are in school. That's just a side note that I wanted to mention because again today I was called to school to collect my sick child!
The Army
I am so grateful that God has called me to ministry. I am equally grateful that He has called me to serve in The Salvation Army. I love Jesus with all of my heart. My goal in life is not to build The Army, but to build An Army that will battle against the sin and death in my community and lift Jesus up as their Savior. This is a heavy responsibility that I do not take lightly.
I often get frustrated when I listen to or read about all of the "great ideas" that will make the Army better... or shall I say change the Army into a different vessel of ministry. I struggle today with how the ministry of loving people as Jesus did, needs to be changed and completely overhauled. I don't get it. I don't see why so much time is spent on "fixing" the perceived brokenness of the Army and it's systems. I would think if time were to be spent on anything, it should be spent on how we can win more souls for the kingdom. Instead we debate! Maybe some of the intellectuals out there can help me understand this whole thing better.
9/11/01
The real reason for my post has to do with 9/11. This has been a bummer of a day. I participated in a Community Service this afternoon. It went well, yet my heart has been hurting all day as I remember and relive the horrible events of 9/11/01. Every American has a different story regarding that day. Every American has difficult feelings regarding that day. I would venture to say that like me, those feelings are still very raw. So raw, that I don't want to talk or write about them just now. I just know that every day that I put my children on the school bus I wonder if anything will happen to them that day. As I watch protesters of the war downtown, I wonder if they will still be around protesting if my son or daughter should go off to war someday. I wonder what villian will be America's enemy when my son is of age to fight for this country. I wonder if my kids will have the opportunity to live out their dreams or if they will live in fear in the years to come. I don't want to wonder anymore. Thing is, I wonder more today, five years after that horrific event, than I ever have. Maybe I've realized that uncertainity and anticipation are now a part of our permanent American psyche.
Blessing to you on this day of Remembrance!
Homeschooling vs. Public Education
I 've always received comments from people, officers in particular, about me being a Salvation Army officer that homeschooled my children. There were few people who understood how I managed to do all that I did. I no longer homeschool. Let me tell you, I have less time for the Army now that I am a "normal" officer than when I homeschooled. My hours are shorter and I get called away from meetings more now that the kids are in school. That's just a side note that I wanted to mention because again today I was called to school to collect my sick child!
The Army
I am so grateful that God has called me to ministry. I am equally grateful that He has called me to serve in The Salvation Army. I love Jesus with all of my heart. My goal in life is not to build The Army, but to build An Army that will battle against the sin and death in my community and lift Jesus up as their Savior. This is a heavy responsibility that I do not take lightly.
I often get frustrated when I listen to or read about all of the "great ideas" that will make the Army better... or shall I say change the Army into a different vessel of ministry. I struggle today with how the ministry of loving people as Jesus did, needs to be changed and completely overhauled. I don't get it. I don't see why so much time is spent on "fixing" the perceived brokenness of the Army and it's systems. I would think if time were to be spent on anything, it should be spent on how we can win more souls for the kingdom. Instead we debate! Maybe some of the intellectuals out there can help me understand this whole thing better.
9/11/01
The real reason for my post has to do with 9/11. This has been a bummer of a day. I participated in a Community Service this afternoon. It went well, yet my heart has been hurting all day as I remember and relive the horrible events of 9/11/01. Every American has a different story regarding that day. Every American has difficult feelings regarding that day. I would venture to say that like me, those feelings are still very raw. So raw, that I don't want to talk or write about them just now. I just know that every day that I put my children on the school bus I wonder if anything will happen to them that day. As I watch protesters of the war downtown, I wonder if they will still be around protesting if my son or daughter should go off to war someday. I wonder what villian will be America's enemy when my son is of age to fight for this country. I wonder if my kids will have the opportunity to live out their dreams or if they will live in fear in the years to come. I don't want to wonder anymore. Thing is, I wonder more today, five years after that horrific event, than I ever have. Maybe I've realized that uncertainity and anticipation are now a part of our permanent American psyche.
Blessing to you on this day of Remembrance!
Saturday, September 09, 2006
Worms Galore
We took our lovely children to see the movie "HOW TO EAT FRIED WORMS" last weekend. I remember reading the book as a kid and I absolutely loved it. In all honesty the movie was cute but a bit gross. You'd think by this point in motherhood I could handle all that is gross and disgusting.
After the movie I verbalized to my children that worms were not that bad and that I could eat one if I wanted. I am a big "Survivor" and "Fear Factor" junkie. I've convinced myself that I could win "Survivor" because of my personality (not my physique of course). I can be really sweet, but at the same time I can read people well. I can also manipulate ( a characteristic from my pre-Christian days). I also believe that through the will of the mind I could eat gross things. Although the blood balls wrapped in pigs intenstines that are used on Fear Factor may be a bit much for me to sink my teeth into.
My kids tried to test me at our Annual Family Labor Day picnic. They found worms for dessert! I refused to eat one. Without notice my eight year old son grabbed one and swallowed it. The entire family about died. Jimmy is a shy kid who NEVER does things like eating worms. As our daughter Emily put it, "Jimmy just became a boy"! It wasn't long after that Emily (0ur 10 year old) ate her worm.
I was stunned at first by the actions of my children. I then had a sense of pride and a bit of joy (silly, I know). They are so comfortable and free. They love to laugh and have fun. They are so confident in who they are as people. That is exactly what being a kid is all about.
I see kids everyday who have had their childhood stolen away from them. They live in fear, with no sense of self-confidence or joy. They have no stability or sense of security about their lives. I praise God that my kids can be kids. I praise Him that they enjoy the life He has given them. I praise Him for instilling confidence in each of them. I also praise Him that He has given me this ministry in which I can be a mom to those children who need a bit of their childhood back. God is amazing...worms and all!
Thursday, July 06, 2006
It has been surprising to me that so many people share such intimate thoughts and feelings on their blog sites. I share, but never felt compelled to share too much. I say this because, for some odd reason, I do feel compelled to lay it all out there today!
I have had a vast array of feelings and thoughts since arriving in this new appointment. A part of me thought that this was way over my head. Another part thought that this appointment would be a piece of cake...humility at its best, I know!
I realized today, that I cannot be anyone but myself. I may not be as "good" as the last guy... I may be "better". Either way, all that matters is that I am myself. God wants to use me. That is an amazing thought if you think about it.... God wants to use me! (He wants to use you too, by the way!)
I woke up tense today knowing that I had a United Way meeting. I ended my afternoon blessed, because I know God had me walk into our soup kitchen yesterday and meet a particular person who needed someone. I spoke with one of his family members today and she said she has been praying for someone (me) to come along side her loved one. God used me and my husband as an answer to prayer that was sent up by someone in New England. Praise God for that one!
Today, I felt at home! I know I am supposed to be here in this appointment. In all honesty, I had my doubts in recent weeks, but praise God that He is in control and His plans are exact and perfect.
I have had a vast array of feelings and thoughts since arriving in this new appointment. A part of me thought that this was way over my head. Another part thought that this appointment would be a piece of cake...humility at its best, I know!
I realized today, that I cannot be anyone but myself. I may not be as "good" as the last guy... I may be "better". Either way, all that matters is that I am myself. God wants to use me. That is an amazing thought if you think about it.... God wants to use me! (He wants to use you too, by the way!)
I woke up tense today knowing that I had a United Way meeting. I ended my afternoon blessed, because I know God had me walk into our soup kitchen yesterday and meet a particular person who needed someone. I spoke with one of his family members today and she said she has been praying for someone (me) to come along side her loved one. God used me and my husband as an answer to prayer that was sent up by someone in New England. Praise God for that one!
Today, I felt at home! I know I am supposed to be here in this appointment. In all honesty, I had my doubts in recent weeks, but praise God that He is in control and His plans are exact and perfect.
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